


Let The Chaos Ensue

by DeeWatter



Series: peter parker is a precious bean [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Everyone Loves Peter Parker, Irondad, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Tony Stark, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), The Author Regrets Nothing, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, infinity war didnt happen because fuck you, just for fun but also there will be angst, loki maybe?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-07
Packaged: 2020-02-16 00:39:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18680581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeeWatter/pseuds/DeeWatter
Summary: Tony thought it was a good and rational idea to create a group chat for the avengers.He was both very wrong and very right.(INFINITY WAR AND ENDGAME DIDN'T HAPPEN, IT WAS ALL JUST A FEVER DREAM)





	1. This was a mistake

[OFFICIAL AVENGERS]

_ [6:01 PM] _

_ [Tonystark entered the chat] _

 

**@tonystark** added **@steverog** , **@buckybarnes** , **@strongestavenger** , **@samW** , **@natromanoff** , **@hawkdude** , **@banner** , and **@peterbparker** to the group

 

_ [Steverog, Hawkdude, and Natromanoff entered the chat] _

 

**Steverog** : What is this, Tony?

 

**Natromanoff** : Why is your @ Steve Rog?

 

**Steverog** : I accidentally hit enter while typing.

 

**Hawkdude** : Lmao

 

_ [6:10 PM] _

 

_ [Peterbparker entered the chat] _

 

**Steverog** : Tony, why did you add your intern to this chat?

 

**Natromanoff** : You mean his son?

 

**Peterbparker** : oh my god it’s the avengers

 

**Tonystark** : Kid, I told you not to use your real name.

 

**Tonystark** : And he’s not my son.

 

**Hawkdude** : Keep telling yourself that

 

**@peterbparker** changed his name to **S** **piderman**

 

**Natromanoff** : …. Peter.

 

**Hawkdude** : I knew it!

 

**Spiderman** : oh shit you could see that?

 

**Tonystark** : This was a mistake...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've seen this trend going around on ao3 for a while now, so I wanted to try it out myself!  
> I'm enjoying it a lot so far.
> 
> *laughs mischievously in lesbian*


	2. Protective dad entered the chat

_ [OFFICIAL AVENGERS] _

_ [11:38 PM] _

_ [Spiderman entered the chat] _

 

**Spiderman** : Mr. staarkk?

 

**Spiderman** : **@tonystark**

 

**Spiderman** : I messed up mr. stark :(

 

_ [Hawkdude entered the chat] _

 

**Hawkdude** : What’s up sticky boy?

 

**Spiderman** : You’re not mr. stark :((

 

**Hawkdude** : Wow I see how it is

 

_ [Tonystark entered the chat] _

 

**Tonystark** : What are you doing up?

 

**Hawkdude** : More like over protective dad entered the chat

 

**Spiderman** : I think I maybe got stabbed?

 

**Tonystark** : WHAT?

 

**Hawkdude** : Oh my god

 

**Spiderman** : Idk I’m still tryna figure out the details

 

**Tonystark** : Jesus christ, okay, I’m coming.

 

**Spiderman** : thx tonyy

 

_ [Spiderman has left the chat] _

 

**Hawkdude** : lmao hurry before he dies

 

**Tonystark** : This fucking kid.

 

_ [Tonystark and Hawkdude has left the chat] _

 

 

_ [OFFICIAL AVENGERS] _

_ [07:09 AM] _

_ [SamW and Buckybarnes entered the chat] _

 

**SamW** : This is what I was talking about

 

**Buckybarnes** : You’re totally right.

 

**Buckybarnes** : He does have a son.

 

_ [Spiderman entered the chat] _

 

**SamW** : Speaking of said son

 

**Spiderman** : Mr. Wilson sir! I got stabbed!

 

**SamW** : So I heard.

 

**Buckybarnes** : You good?

 

**Spiderman** : Never been better!

 

**Spiderman** : Actually, that’s a lie, happy once took me out for ice cream

 

_[07:12 AM]_

_ [Hawkdude entered the chat] _

 

**Hawkdude** : YOU CAN CHANGE OTHER PEOPLES NAMES

 

**@Hawkdude** changed **@peterbparker** ’s name to **Stickyboi**

 

**Stickyboi** : Why would you do this sir?

 

**Stickyboi** : After all I’ve done

 

**Hawkdude** : Like what?

 

**@SamW** changed **@Tonystark** ’s name to **Irondad**

 

**Hawkdude** : Ha!

 

**Buckybarnes** : Nice

 

**Stickyboi** : He won’t like that :S

 

**SamW** : That’s the point kid


	3. I just wanted a Capri Sun

_[OFFICIAL AVENGERS]_

_[01:45 PM]_

_[Stickyboi entered the chat]_

 

**Stickyboi** : Can someone help me?

 

_[Steverog and Hawkdude entered the chat]_

 

**Stickyboi** : What is the formula of linear acceleration? I forgot

 

**Steverog** : Why do you need to know?

 

**Stickyboi** : I’m taking my final exam rn and I want to get an A

 

**Steverog** : I’m not helping you cheat, Peter.

 

**Steverog** : And put away your phone.

 

**Hawkdude** : It’s not like you know the answer anyway, old man

 

**Steverog** : And do you?

 

**@Hawkdude** changed **@Steverog** ’s name to **Oldman** **™**

 

**Oldman** **™** : …..

 

_[Banner entered the chat]_

 

**Banner** : v(final) = v(initial) + Δv and v=a•t

 

**Stickyboi** : Thanks a bunch!

 

**Banner** : No problem :D

 

_[Stickyboi has left the chat]_

 

**Hawkdude** : Oh ew Bruce uses emoji’s

 

 

 

_[OFFICIAL AVENGERS]_

_[07:19 PM]_

_[Irondad entered the chat]_

 

**Irondad** : Has anyone seen Peter? He was next to me a second ago.

 

_[Strongestavenger and Natromanoff entered the chat]_

 

**Strongestavenger** : THE SPIDERLING IS ON THE FRIDGE

 

**Natromanoff** : Thor, calm down.

 

**Natromanoff** : Tony he’s in the kitchen and he won’t come down.

 

**Irondad** : What do you mean he won’t come down?

 

**Natromanoff** : I think he’s stuck.

 

**Strongestavenger** : WHAT DO WE DO STARK? I AM WORRIED FOR THE CHILD’S LIFE

 

_[SamW entered the chat]_

 

**SamW** : Why do I hear screaming??

 

**Natromanoff** : You can hear him all the way from the gym?

 

**Irondad** : Thor I swear to god if you make my kid deaf

 

_[Stickyboi entered the chat]_

 

**Stickyboi** : I jUSt wAntED a cAPriSun

 

**Stickyboi** : thEreS a LArge MAn sCreAMinG at ME

 

**SamW** : That’s Thor.

 

**Stickyboi** : OH MY GOD

 

**Irondad** : Why can’t you just type like a normal civilized human?

 

**Irondad** : Wait.

 

**Irondad** : Who changed my name?

 

_[SamW has left the chat]_

 

**@Tonystark** changed **@SamW’s** name to **ClammySammy**

 

**Stickyboi** : Mr. stark, is that a Garbage Pail Kids reference?

 

**Irondad** : This is why you’re my intern.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea if what Bruce said was true, I just looked it up on Yahoo Answers :')


	4. Are you proud of me dad??

_[OFFICIAL AVENGERS]_

_[6:01 PM]_

_[strongestavenger and stickyboi entered the chat]_

 

 **Stickyboi** : OHMYGODMRSTARK

 

_[ Oldman ™ and Buckybarnes entered the chat]_

 

 **Oldman** ™: What happened Peter?

 

 **Strongestavenger** : This is a moment to celebrate, starkson!

 

 **Stickyboi** : MISTERSTARKIMFREAKINGOUT

 

_[Irondad entered the chat]_

 

 **Irondad** : What’s going on?

 

 **Buckybarnes** : Your son is freaking out.

 

 **Stickyboi** : Thor asked me to get him his hammer as a joke and then i bent down to pick it up because i thought “hey why not try??” and then i actually lifted it and oh my god-

 

 **Strongestavenger** : The spider is worthy!

 

 **Oldman** ™: WHat??

 

 **Irondad** : ExcUSE ME?

 

 **Buckybarnes** : No way

 

 **Stickyboi** : Yes way! I lifted thor’s hammer bucky sir!!

 

 **Irondad** : And I wasn’t there to get it on film?!?

 

 **Buckybarnes** : Obviously, as his father, you should’ve been there to see it.

 

 **Irondad** : Yeah!

 

 **Irondad** : Wait

 

 **Irondad** : No!

 

 **Strongestavenger** : Congratulate your son for being worthy, Stark!

 

 **Stickyboi** : Are you proud of me dad??

 

 **Irondad** : Yes, Pete, I'm very proudfgggg

 

 **Oldman** ™: But Peter isn't your son?

 

 **Stickyboi** : :((

 

 **Irondad** : Hey, excuse you! You don’t say that to my kid!

 

 **Oldman** ™: ????

 

 **Buckybarnes** : This is amazing

 

 **Oldman** ™: This is driving me insane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Tony had a heart attack for a second there....
> 
> Short one today, sorry! I'll do a longer one tomorrow!


	5. What did you do this time, Stark?

_ [OFFICIAL AVENGERS] _

_ [5:30 PM] _

_ [Irondad entered the chat] _

 

**Irondad** : Okay, seriously, this is the second time this week, Peter.

 

**Irondad** : Why are you late again?

 

_ [ClammySammy entered the chat] _

 

**ClammySammy** : Oh shit,  **@peterbparker** is in trouble

 

**ClammySammy** : You better get here before your dad fires you from the Avengers

 

_ [Stickyboi entered the chat] _

 

**Stickyboi** : Tony.

 

**Irondad** : ?

 

**ClammySammy** : Oh no, he used your first name, he’s either mad or in trouble

 

**Irondad** : What’s with the attitude, kid? I’ve been waiting for you for an hour.

 

**Irondad** : Where are you?

 

**Stickyboi** : I’m outside of school.

 

**ClammySammy** : In this weather?

 

**ClammySammy** : It’s a freaking storm out there

 

**Stickyboi** : ……

 

**Stickyboi** : I’ve been standing here for two hours.

 

**Irondad** : Oh no,

 

**Irondad** : Happy.

 

**Stickyboi** : Yah.

 

**Irondad** : I’m so sorry-

 

**ClammySammy** : Wait- backtrack, Happy is your driver right?

 

**Irondad** : I forgot he was on vacation.

 

**Irondad** : Peter please say you’re at least inside.

 

**Stickyboi** : “Wait outside” he said, “you need the fresh air, take an umbrella,” he said.

 

**ClammySammy** : Are you trying to kill him Tony??

 

**Irondad** : I didn’t think he’d have to stand there for two hours!

 

**Irondad** : I’ll tell Steve to pick you up, I’m sorry Pete.

 

**Stickyboi** : It’s okay, I’ll just go home, thanks anyways Mr. Stark

 

**Irondad** : Kid...

 

_ [Stickyboi has left the chat] _

 

 

 

_ [OFFICIAL AVENGERS] _

_ [8:40 AM] _

_ [Oldman ™ and Natromanoff entered the chat] _

 

**@Steverog** changed his name to  **IAmSteveRogers**

 

**IAmSteveRogers** :  **@tonystark** why is there a lady screaming for you in the lobby?

 

**Natromanoff** : She’s pretty mad, what’d you do?

 

_ [Irondad entered the chat] _

 

**Irondad** : Who?

 

**Natromanoff** : She says her name is May

 

**IAmSteveRogers** : And she’s demanding to speak with you right this moment.

 

**Natromanoff** : “Or I’ll make sure he never sees my boy again” What did you do this time, Stark?

 

**Irondad** : That would be Peter’s aunt, she’s probably mad at me for yesterday.

 

**Irondad** : Omw 

 

**IAmSteveRogers** : Yesterday? Right, so this is about when you left the sixteen year old boy to stand outside in the freezing rain for two hours straight?

 

**Irondad** : We all make mistakes, Rogers

 

_ [Stickyboi entered the chat] _

 

**Stickyboi** : Mr. Stark I’m so sorry about May!

 

**Stickyboi** : I told her not to go but she did anyways!

 

**Irondad** : It’s fine, squirt, I deserve some talking to.

 

**Sitckyboi** : But Mr. Staarkk

 

_ [Irondad has left the chat] _

 

**IAmSteveRogers** : How are you Queens?

 

**Stickyboi** : I'm no longer Stickyboi, I'm Sickyboi :(

 

**Stikyboi** : May is mad because she won’t be able to leave for her business trip since I’m sick

 

**Natromanoff** : If she’s scared to leave you by yourself, why don’t you just stay at the compound?

 

_ [Irondad entered the chat] _

 

**Irondad** : That’s exactly what he’s going to do,

 

**Irondad** : Pack your stuff, Pete! I’m picking you up in 30.

 

**Stickyboi** : whAHSht??

 

**Stickyboi** : I’m gonna stay at the compound??

 

**Stickyboi** : Holy fuck

 

**IAmSteveRogers** : Language

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit 19/05/08:
> 
> I totally forgot that Tony changed Sam's username! Thanks for telling me!


End file.
